Thoughts re-discovered

I've been reading through my old journal entries this week and I found a few that I thought I would share... I guess it's maybe my way of reminding myself of God's truth, His voice and His faithfulness. Plus, since I've been so remiss in posting on the blog, here's a little slice of the last months of my journey. :)

August 12, 2009:

Water poured over thirsty ground softens it, brings life to it. Fills in the cracks and makes it fruitful again. Brokenness disappears and new life springs up. Oh living water, pour over me again, fill in the cracks where I lose myself.


October 14, 2009:

"What would happen if I risked everything? Let it all go - my hopes and dreams and goals and started from scratch? Rebuild from the ground up with Christ as the foundation? "Come back to your first love at the foot of the cross" What might I discover if I surrendered everything and made a point of remaining at the foot of the cross? Who might I find there? Where would you lead me next? If I truly allowed You to be the centre of my life, the point around which everything else revolves, the context in which I function? How would you revolutionize my thinking? My very breathing? How might you use me if I made myself fully available?"

October 17, 2009:

"This moment, this day, this sky, this is my life. How many times have I sat on this ferry watching the same sky? Ever the same, but ever changing. Do birds ever fall from the sky in exhaustion? There are fish in the clouds, birds in the waves. Seagulls floating on driftwood.

The water is so still.

The sun is almost gone, but some of the clouds are still letting through little pieces of yellow and pink sky.

Something exciting. You. To shake up what was dead inside of me and breathe life and purpose into my soul.

To enjoy Your presence. To stop gaming for answers.

To love you like it matters, because it matters. To love you like it changes me, because it changes me. To be captured and enraptured and extravagantly loved in return. Yet, not in return. In the beginning. And the middle. And the end. Ever after.

February 21, 2010:

Isaiah 40:31 "but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint" The word "to renew" in this context literally means "to exchange", in reference to clothing, which symbolizes beauty and strength. And so, as we trade our weakness for hope (trust and expectancy that God will come through for us) we are clothed in strength and beauty!

March 9, 2010:

From Daniel chapter 10 --> "[He] touched me and gave me strength, 'do not be afraid' [...] he said, 'Peace! Be strong now, be strong!" When He spoke to me I was strengthened and said, 'Speak, my Lord, since you have given me strength.'"

March 17, 2010:

Unspeakable peace
in exchange
for all the broken
pieces.

I do not require wholeness from you. I want the broken pieces. All of them. Wholeness is what I give to you! So bring me all the broken pieces. All your fears, your worries, your insecurities, your hurts, your shame, your anger. lay it at my feet and let me reconstruct you. It is only in wholeness that you will be well-equipped to fight the battle that I have set before you. So let me speak truth to you, let me speak beauty over your life. Let me touch you, heal you, redeem your heart.

March 19, 2010:

"Love does not exist in the absence of choice."

May 20, 2010:



What can I do with my obsession?
With the things I cannot see?
Is there madness in my being?
Is it wind that blows the trees?

Sometimes You're further than the moon.
Sometimes You're closer than my skin.
And You surround me like a winter fog.
You've come and burned me with a kiss.

And my heart burns for You.
And my heart burns.

And I'm so filthy with my sin.
I carry pride like a disease.
You know I'm stubborn God and I'm longing to be close.
You burn me deeper than I know.

I feel lonely without hope.
I feel desperate without vision.
You wrap around me like a winter fog.
You come and free me like a bird.

And my heart burns for You.

May 21, 2010:

If you look at the circumstances of life, you'll always wonder if God loves you.

Get cross-eyed!